We all create these things in our life:
– Petty arguments with our spouse/partner
– Friends being disappointed in us
– Clients or colleagues frustrated when they thought we would deliver something and it didn’t meet their expectations.
There is a practice that I have implemented more in my life and business in recent years that has significantly reduced the amount of petty arguments and miscommunications with those around me.
In today’s Awaken TV episode, learn what that practice is and why I had been so resistant to doing it in the past. Many ‘spiritual’ people are resistant to this and it causes unnecessary pain and distrust among others.
This practice can save friendships, marriages, and client or colleague relationships down the road. How often are you implementing this practice?
I’d love to know what stops you from doing this practice and making agreements with those you want to build strong relationships with.
Post a comment or question below.
After you watch this short video, I encourage you to make a list of the things in your life and your business where there is not yet a clear agreement made between you and another party. This will drastically reduce the amount of unnecessary arguments and pain down the road.
Much love,
P.S. If you want to turn your business that you have been treating as a hobby into a thriving money earner get to Awaken Your Impact in September. If you are like us and see that growing your business can be your spiritual practice, get to Awaken Your Impact. This event covers 5 key areas of training you must master if you are going to stand out in your industry, master your fear, and double your sales over the next 12 months. Check out some video clips from our event last year: http://AwakenYourImpact.com
We’d love to have you join us.
Oh holy ****
Now you got me. I have none, zero, agreements … none to any direction.
(pause – breathing)
No excuses, I’ll start making a list. Right now – still in shock – cannot not think even one for my business.
I think I need a time out.
Will start with tomorrows Skype call.
Grateful for the being nailed-effect.
Thank you Rachael Jayne!
You’re so welcome, Lis. I’m happy this has been an eye-opening video for you!
Hi Rachael Jane, interesting topic!
One big fear of me is that ‘they may think I don’t trust them and feel humiliated by that’
I have a question:
– Some people just seem to have no respect for such things. They just simply trespass the contract we made and say they don’t care about it. So that is when I get really big fights. When there is no official institute to go to when people trespass, what is it worth? I guess the only way to avoid this is just not to work with unreliable people. But you do not always know that in advance. Any tips?
And my commitment for next week is that I will set a time limit for how long I will have a nice Skype conversation with a good friend.
I’m also planning to set some clear rules for my healing clients. But it feels a bit strange to have them sign anything. I never heard of anyone doing that, and never did that myself.
Thank you so much for sharing all these things every week! And for all the other things you do too!
Love, Navah.
Thank you, Navah. You’re right: some people seem to have no respect for contracts, but it’s how we handle this trespassing that helps us to remain in integrity in the long run. Watch for red flags, especially if you’ve encountered a similar situation in the past, and good on you for now setting boundaries for your Skype call!
This is correct action! Agreements are like building a container for a relationship to flourish in. Boundaries contain energy and allow it to be focused and potent. Leadership is so often about establishing those compassionate boundaries so there can be flourishing. What a beautiful reminder, thank you!
You’re very welcome, Sarah, and I couldn’t agree more about boundaries being a container for the relationship to flourish.
I always write up a simple “Letter of Agreement” for my painting clients. It states what I will do for them and what they will do in terms of a payment structure. We both sign the LOA and I haven’t had any problems except with a very few loonies who disregard or deny a signed document. When that happens I get the hell out of there. Let them go. Very good advice on personal conversations, too, Rachael Jayne. It could enrich our friendships.
Yes, what a good idea, Peg. The disregard of contracts/agreements always happens with a few, but if you can see the overall benefit then you’re heading for better business and/or personal relationships in the long run.
Very good advice. W should have contracts with our clients. Thank you for the tool. It is a good practice in relationship building.
You’re welcome, Nancy. I’m glad you found the advice helpful.
Yes, I use agreements regularly which I am so grateful to have learnt in an NLP training course years ago. Agreements at the beginning of a conversation, teaching contract or speaking gig help set the ‘frame’ for what’s to come. And like you said, Rachael Jayne when either one of the parties meanders outside the agreed upon frame the other person can (more easily) remind them of what was agreed upon at the beginning. Works a charm!! And, any topics outside the agreement that are important can be noted and discussed at a future meeting. Setting a frame / agreement is the first step in New Code NLP ‘verbal package’ and is brilliant!
Thank you for the kind words of encouragement, Jacquie. I have found that agreements at the beginning of work or a conversation can greatly reduce the number of arguments or disagreements that might arise.
really so true, dear Rachael, as for me, i started to feel the need of such thing, be it regarding the Yunus Emre farm when people come for seminars or worshop, (and here the agreements indeed evolve with each experience) or with people whom i try, or intend or hope to work with… and the “rule” that came out of that is that each time people do not really like the idea of having agreement, …..i feel it will not work together and it is always true ! at some stage some argument takes place and … bye bye ..
the thing that made me kind of resistant to that is that i thought we could base the relationship on MUTUAL TRUST but it is not true. We all have weak points be it money (the strongest maybe!) or others, and when it comes about it…. trust disappears and only “me my ego” comes on the line …. 🙂 so really good to have a paper, something written to calm down all mental dispersion and come back to the focused rules …
Also another reason, maybe, the fact that in all countries the “administrative paperwork ” is soooo heavy, and probably all of us have more or less reacted at some stage in our lives “against” such things … at least I did, and thus i have been feeling reluctant to establishing rules in my own life …
but sure it is needed AND POSITIVELY beneficial, the only thing, is that they need to be RIGHT and as you said, adaptable, changeable when the need is here…
thank you SOOOO much for everything dear Rachael
Yes, the rules do need to be adaptable and perhaps also evolve over time and experience. Great insight, Isabelle!